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What are the keywords searched and digital tools used by adulterers in the USA
Hello and thank you for your research request on the keywords and digital tools used by adulterers in the United States. It is my understanding that you are providing privacy services and are specifically interested in “content sources and information resources (sites/groups/blogs) of this target group.” Toward that end, I have found that there are numerous websites, online groups and smartphone applications which are geared towards extramarital affairs, in one avenue or another. Some are designed to help the potential adulterer find someone with which he or she could have an affair and other are intended to hide the adulterer’s tracks once the affair is started. Regardless of the reasons for the affair, the adulterer, in most cases, has one underlying goal – to not get caught. Below you will find the results of my research in more detail as well as a spreadsheet I created of 25 smartphone applications that are used by those who wish to keep their indiscretions hidden.
METHODOLOGY
Because it appears you are mostly interested in ways in which you can market your privacy-protecting services to potential customers, I focused my research on websites, applications and other online tools which appear to be used most by those either wishing to enter into an affair or those who are already in an affair and wish for that affair to remain a secret. My research sources included websites that offer their services to people looking to start an affair, online articles (mostly from online newspapers and journals, but also from the “cheating” websites themselves) as well as online survey and statistics websites. I also based a part of my research on how to not get caught while cheating which would seem to be an integral part of your marketing strategy.
WEBSITES
Cupid’s Library, a website which describes itself as “a database of dating sites that provides visitors with unbiased, fact-based information for a large collection of dating sites available on the Internet” has posted a list of “Top-ranked Affair Dating Sites” which they say have been personally picked and reviewed by their staff and users. The sites in order are as follows:
Cupid's Library ranks Meet Locals as their top pick, mostly because the site "operates through a geo-based algorithm that determines where you are and who else lives near you." In other words, if long distance relationships aren't your thing, Meet Locals is for you. As with most of the sites, Meet Locals has both free and paid plans. These sites are mainly used in the initial search for a partner with which to have an affair. There are other sites, discussed below, which are geared towards keeping the affair a secret.
ONLINE GROUPS/BLOGS
I was not able to find too many online groups and/or blogs for adulterers, which is not surprising considering most people in affairs do their best to remain hidden and not expose themselves to discovery, online or otherwise. One Facebook group I did find, aptly titled "Extramarital Affairs" describes itself as a "discreet and anonymous website for those looking for an affair or a fling and that bit extra they don't get at home." Another Facebook Group, "Extra-Marital Affairs" simply says "Because some of us need a little recreation... " Those using Facebook for affairs need to be careful though, one marketing site, Brandon & Gaille, reports that "[i]n one survey, 41% of people who admitted that they had cheated said that their actions on Facebook is what led them to get caught." One fact I found particularly interesting as I am from Michigan, is that three states, South Carolina, Minnesota and Michigan, have laws that prohibit Facebook affairs under each state's adultery statutes. A 2001 study by the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers linked Facebook to one out of every five divorces in the United States.
SMARTPHONE APPLICATIONS
Applications which assist those who wish to cheat on their significant other and not get caught are plentiful. Most rely on removing traces of text messages, phone messages and GPS data from the phone on which the app is installed. There are others that will pretend the phone is disconnected or display a special message such as "system memory low" when the "other woman" calls at an inopportune time. Because the list (obtained from a site known as Complex in an article entitled "25 Apps to Help You Cheat on Your Girlfriend") is quite lengthy and full of information, I created a Google Spreadsheet which includes the name of the application, the platform upon which the app will work, the description from the website and if the app isn't free, the cost to download it.
One application which isn't mentioned on this list is SnapChat. SnapChat can be used to exchange photos - explicit or otherwise - with other SnapChat users and the exchanged media will "self-destruct" a short time after it is sent. Users of this app need to beware though, the expired "snaps" aren't really gone until they are permanently removed from the device's memory. Another application which has the "self-destruct" feature, this time for text messages is TigerText. TigerText has been downloaded 3.5 million times since its introduction in February of 2010.
KEYWORDS FOR CHEATING
I performed numerous searches in the course of my research and found common words in many different areas and sites. The keywords which appeared most in my research were as follows:
- Adultery
- Betrayal
- Casual Sex
- Deception
- Estranged
- Extramarital Relationship
- Facebook Affair
- Flirting
- Illicit
- Indiscretion
- Indulgence
- Infidelity
- Married but Looking
- One-Night Stand
- Online Affair
- Open Marriage/Relationship
- Philandering
- Relations
- Romantic Friendship
- Secret
- Sexless Marriage
- Straying
- Swinging
- Unhappy Marriage
These were terms and words that came up throughout my research on many different occasions. I have provided direct cites to some of the places the words turned up.
One site which deals with how to tell if your spouse is cheating suggest to search for words such as “love”, “affair,” “cheat,” “meet,” or “wife.”
COVERING THEIR TRACKS AKA DON'T GET CAUGHT
AshleyMadison.com, an online dating and social networking service which markets people who are married or in committed relationships, recently polled 110,000 of its members and "asked them to divulge the details on how they've managed to keep their affairs secret." The members provided seven things that they do to keep things under wraps. They are as follows, verbatim from the site:
" Stay tight-lipped. Eleven percent of Ashley Madison users polled said they kept the personal details of their lives — their home address, their spouse’s place of employment — under wraps before and following the affair, lest their affair partner blow their cover.
Go the distance. Nine percent of respondents said they’ve traveled miles from their home to meet with their lover so they wouldn’t be spotted by anyone they knew.
Hide the evidence. Lipstick on your collar or stray boxers in the backseat won’t fly if you want to stay married. Seven percent of those polled said they made an effort to hide any evidence of their indiscretions.
Foolproof your phone . Six percent of cheaters said they scooped up a second phone or an app like Blackbook so they could chat with their affair partners without being caught.
Maintain the status quo. Five percent of respondents said they avoided making any drastic changes to their appearance when they were cheating.
Use a condom. Only five percent of those polled said using protection to avoid bringing home an STD or getting pregnant was key to keeping their affairs on the down-low.
Don’t leave a paper trail.Two percent of cheaters said they paid for hotels and fancy dinners for two with cash, to avoid getting caught by way of an incriminating credit card statement."
An article on AskMen.com called 9 Rules for Not Getting Caught has similiar advice, but with a few additional pointers:
(1) Keep your mouth shut
(2) Be cautious
(3) Plan, plan, plan
(4) Don’t leave any evidence
(5) Plan on consequences
(6) Limit the people in the deal
(7) Be ready to abandon everything
(8) Don’t change your habits
(9) Remember the little things.
One last site of interest, AffairHandbook.com, suggests that in order to avoid being caught in an affair, the cheater should (1) use Google Chrome in the incognito mode which doesn't create a history, doesn't leave cookies and doesn't leave anything in the user's computer's cache. (2) Get a prepaid cell phone. (3) Get a prepaid debit card and carry cash. (4) Use a brand new email account and only use it when you are incognito.
CONCLUSION
In this day and age, with all of the technology and electronic resources easily, and most of the time, freely, available, beginning and maintaining an adulterous relationship is a fairly easy thing to do. The would-be cheater just needs to know where to look - and what to download.
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